Eva is at the babysitter’s at the moment.
Nil dropped her off this morning – and will do so every morning from today onwards – and as I strapped her into the stroller, say goodbye and told her that I’ll see her later again, I couldn’t help but feel a little bit guilty for going back to work and leaving her with a complete stranger. As Nil and her left, I watched as she sleepily looked around – we had to wake her up early – and well, I had to tell myself not to cry.
I see reminders of her everywhere – the exersaucer lying still, the toy blocks sitting there and most obvious of all, an empty crib – and I tell myself that the day will be over fast enough and I’ll see her soon again. Despite all these feelings of guilt and such, part of me feels a certain breath of fresh air at being able toenjoy the simple things again, like a nice long shower, blogging about allergy beddings or a trip to the hairdresser’s or breakfast/lunch without having to rush or worry about whether she’s going to fall over something she shouldn’t fall over.
Of course I do worry about how she is at the babysitter’s…
I only hope that the two of us can adjust to the situation as fast and as best as we both can. Lets hope time flies by quickly today – and for the coming days – as it did ever since I turned twenty. *keeps fingers crossed*
Having said all that, I can’t wait to see her later today!