He started talking to me again, after months of what He calls “just to be on the safe side of things”. Me? I just saw it as being ‘pouty’.

(Now I am not saying that I was without faults in the entire scenario, but how can I not deny the fact that I was just being honest and that my Asian upbringing led me to do what was best at that time – be nice to Him face-to-face and then bitch about my grievances on a blog or to friends?)

The conversation went from how He was to my blog entries and then to the cabinet reshuffling before settling onto the final crux of the matter – “Yes, I do have a problem talking to you”.

As much as I have tried to steer the conversation away from the topic of us (in past tense), He tries to move it back to just that. I appreciate the honesty. I appreciate the explaination. But I do not appreciate the idea of Him thinking that He still matters that much to me – good or bad.

Perhaps He was looking for an apology and I had none to give. (I doubt it.) I suspect it has everything to do with the fact that we might end up working in the bloody same building.

I’ll be honest. I have no qualms about working with Him. About seeing His face on a daily basis. About being seated next to Him. Okay…remove that last one. It is a bit too much. But my point is that while I may be a total bitch to someone I hate, I am not about to begrudge ANYONE a chance to make a living anywhere. If I was, I would not be a bitch. I would be a malicious bitch.

But I am hardly that. Bitch, yes. Malicious? Nah.

It is just that I find it humourous when He keeps on about how wary He is about talking to me, and about how wary He is about the possibility about being my colleague. I mean if the whole situation was so wary-ful, why the heck did He apply for the goddamn position in the first place?

Ooops. I forgot one thing.

He is the forgetful type. That’s my ex for ya.

He is so forgetful that He still thinks He occupies a good portion of my waking moments, thoughts, desires. So forgetful that He thinks I would cart Him off all drugged with chlorofome to a torture chamber like in Saw II. So forgetful that He fails to realized that my life has stopped revolving around Him.

I have other people to cart off to my own variation of a pleasurable torture chamber, namely Boyfriend. I have other things to occupy my waking moments, namely work, friends, family and Boyfriend.

And my life revolves around a whole lot of other things.

So is this whole thing a sign?

Yup. A sign that whoever said that “old flames burn brightest when lit a second time” is someone who have never been through the “bitten once, twice shy” scenario.