Get a divorce?

I mean of course you would if we were talking about your friends or your colleague or even a relative. It is, after all, their life and if you’re anything like me, you let them live it the way they want to.

BUT what if one of your parent was thinking of getting a divorce? Would you let them?

No, no…my parents aren’t thinking of getting a divorce – they have a lovely relationship and besides, they don’t believe in divorce (marriage is for life is their motto). This is about a few people I know.

Now this is the scenario…

A parent (lets name the person…E) had been thinking about filing for divorce and his/her kiddies are trying to talk him/her out of it. The marriage, E thinks, can’t be salvaged. E’s partner just doesn’t understand his/her ambition, dreams and is just so difficult to live with these days. He/She has changed into something that E cannot comprehend, understand or even accept. E doesn’t, if rarely, gets any compliments, affection or even comfort from his/her own partner. In short, the marriage, E feels, is like a marriage of convenience – there is no more love in it. Now E’s children are in their late and early twenties and thus, it is only now that E has decided to bring up the issue.

So, if you were E’s child, would asking E to bear on with it still make sense? Or would you brave the unknown with E and agree to him/her getting a divorce?

I would actually ask E to get a divorce, especially after trying for many years to work things out between him/her and the partner.

A marriage should be a positive, happy one (speaking on an overall, that is) – it should make both partners satisfied and happy. Most of all, it should be filled with ever-continuing and ever-growing love. Without love, everything else seems to fall apart – in my opinion anyway. We can and will almost fail to make our partners happy if we stop loving them. And once that happens and continue to over ten or even twenty years, people drift apart, so far apart that they lose sight of what made them came together in the first place. When that happens, nothing you do or say can change things.

The moment one parent starts talking or even starts thinking about divorce, you know you have lost the battle. You know that they are close to their limit. It is just a matter of time. For most people anyway.

As the child I look at my parents and I want happiness for both of them. If it meant them getting it while being apart, why not? I’m no longer young and I should be able to understand that 1) marriage should be a blessing and not a curse, 2) if there is no love in it, why force yourself to stay on because you’re afraid of being alone, or afraid of hurting someone, and 3) people should never stay in relationships for convenience. It makes people and others around them miserable. Perhaps I’m different in thinking this way.

As the adult (with the prospect of getting married and etc looming ahead in the near future), I would never want to stay in a relationship whereby I’m never appreciated, not sure if I’m even loved or not and hell, I would never ever stay because I’m afraid of the future. I know I deserve more and if my partner has stopped giving it to me (even after trying), why should I stay on? Of course there is more to take into consideration but here I am, telling myself that after twenty years of staying with the same man who has changed so much that I can’t even see why we got together in the first place…don’t you think I am better off alone now that my kids can fend for themselves?

Now…what about you?

NOTE: Potential female anatomy and sexual health details up ahead!

Most of us are probably familiar with the use of yeast (or at least what yeast is) – in beers, and breads – but how many of us know that we have yeast cells in our bodies? Ohyes, we have them in our mouths and for the women, in our vaginas too; they live side by side with some very good bacteria and well, some not so good ones. Yeast is part of the whole system of living organisms in our bodies and when one small bit of the ’system’ is disrupted, some bacteria explode in terms of population, leading to infections.

Commonly known as ‘vaginal yeast infection‘ or just ‘yeast infection’, Candidiasis is just that – an organism population explosion. It usually occurs because of stress, changes in the hormones, frequent douching, too much sugar (diabetic women get this alot) and even changes in the Ph level of the vagina itself.

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It has been a crazy nearly one week for me – with its ups and downs – downs being the fact that I am jobless and suffering from a slight ear infection (BLECK!)…ups being Harry Potter coming out and me going for second round interviews.

I spent the entire week keeping as busy as I can and now, it looks like I can enjoy whatever free time I have left.

Yes, you read it right.

I’ll have to enjoy whatever free time I have left because people, I’ll be starting work on 16th of August in Cyberjaya as a sub-editor.

^______________^

Never mind that it is in another land by itself – pretty far but I plan to go by public transport. Never mind that I’ll probably have to bring my own lunch and change my gym membership to “Passport” instead of “Home. Never mind that I’ll be starting work immediately after my Vietnam trip.

It’s alright. New opportunities demand new changes. I’ll adapt. I’ll adjust.

It’s okay. Thanks to all for their support.

I’M SO HAPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

^______________^

Anyone who knows me very well will have this to say about me: “She is a worrypot first and next, a pressure cooker.”

True to form, I’m starting to feel the downs of being jobless. So far, I have gone for two interviews (got to the second round for one of them – which I’m planning to turn down for reasons that I’ll explain later) and that is it. Dozens of applications have been sent out and so far, the trail has gone cold. And I’m beginning to worry heaps.

To make matters worse, it is taking a toll on my relationship with Nil. My parents don’t really have a problem with it – because there was once Dad was jobless for a couple of long months and things were a bit tight but it didn’t escalate into fights. He took up tourism studies to kill time and later found a job. But that’s Dad. He had his pension to tide things over and I reckoned he has more control over his emotions and mind than I do.

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Well, things have been slightly different now that I’m no longer working. People assume that I’m having a jolly good time taking a break but I somehow feel different about the whole thing. I wake up around the same time as well, and I still do housechores and stuff – like run errands, for my parents and boyfriend – not to mention go around hunting for jobs. In a way, it is work; in a way, it isn’t.

I now have more time to spend doing things like baking, gym-ing, travelling meeting friends and blogging – but somehow I just haven’t done all of those things except for the “meeting friends” and “travelling” bit. I spent most of my afternoon yesterday out. First to run errands and drop off some of my former colleague’s stuff and then lunch with my former students. I bumped into a couple of them at the local mall and well, we just hung around, talked, window shopped and that was it.

Note: I’m the type who just can’t stay at home and rot. Besides, my parents just gave me several assignments – design a website and business card for them over the next two weeks. I reckon I’ll have to start on it tomorrow – have a few ideas in mine, so we’ll see how it goes.

Anyway, by the time I got back, it was time to shower, read some newspaper, chat with my parents, cook my dinner and then off to French class. Somehow in between all that, I got a call to attend an interview with a local education institute today around noon – which brings me to consider about a few things. What my options are should I get offers from both the industry and the education sector – bearing in mind that I might have to work overseas in the near future? I know it is too soon to tell but in my case, I reckon it never hurt to consider things like that.

Well, I best get started on breakfast now, if I want to get ready for my interview later. After that, it’s a visit to the gym and sauna there. ^_^

And because I was tagged by thesam117:

5 songs that I currently love (in no particular order):

• We’ve Got Tonight by Kenny Rogers and Shena Easton
• Cut Both Ways by Gloria Estefan
• What Matters Most by Rankin Kenny
• Belaian Jiwa by Innuendo
• Imagine by Beatles

By the way, did I mention that Dad is thinking of installing a CD player in my car??? WHOPPPIEEE!!!!

The weekend has been quite good; have not felt this sudden surge in excitement over the prospects of a second interview (and of finding a job). Neither did I feel this rush in me about the simplest things in life – things that amuse me even though I have other things to worry about.

Job interview
I’m keeping my fingers crossed about this job interview – I went for it on Saturday morning. It was not a big interview, since it was conducted by a recruitment agency. There was a test for me to go through – proof-reading/editing test – and I spent the rest of the time just chatting with the consultant.

Was told that I stand a very good chance of being called in for the second round – since I did quite okay on the test and my profile is relevant and suitable for the job. Also, since the payroll for the position comes from Australia, it also looks like they can pay me what I ask for. Training is provided – and the office (in Cyberjaya, which is currently under expansion) is managed by the team from Australia and not here. I’m hoping to hear from the guy over the next few days – since he did mention that the Senior HR Consultant is very organized and efficient – apparently she normally contacts him within a few hours to a day at most.

I’m excited about this – well, I’m always excited about new opportunities, and new chances that allow me to showcase my potential, character and talent. Wish me luck!!! ^_^

Harry Potter Six
Was around KLCC during the launch – at Kinokuniya specially. There were plenty of copies lying around the two entrances and even during lunchtime, people were queuing up to pay RM99.90 for a copy of JK Rowling’s latest creation. And yes, I’m one of the few adults who follow the story – it’s not my fault if it is one of the more interesting fiction books around. To each their own, I suppose.

Anyway, I didn’t know if I really wanted to get the book since it is super expensive and I’m too tight on cash to afford an expense that I can do without at the moment. So I did the next best thing. I grabbed a copy – I was there early since my interview was in KL – found a quiet spot somewhere near the music section and read the first few chapters and the last two chapters. I pretty much know the ending but am confused over several things. It is something that I won’t discuss until I get a copy of the book and read it from cover to cover. Nil is going to help me check if the book is slightly cheaper in Singapore. He finds the craze of Harry Potter interesting.

I wonder if people went nuts over Enid Blyton back in the 80s.

Fantastic Four
The movie was…nothing big to shout about. I personally felt that the concentration on the drama between Reed Richards and Sue Storm plus Ben and Johnny actually overshadowed their fight with Dr Doom (Victor Von Doom). Sure, this is an intro but compared to the X-Men, this was a big disappointment. Was hoping to see more action, more insight into their abilities and etc…but all I had to go on was the soapy dialogue, brash stupid hero action from Johnny and Ben’s turmoil.

Although I must admit one thing: they managed to get the right people for the roles – reminded me a lot about the comic series – the only problem? Jessica Alba’s hair here looks pretty fake. The other saving grace? Call me a sucker for proposal scenes but the one in FF was kinda sweet with Mr Smart but Dumb proposing to Sue Storm with a piece of wreckage from the cosmic storm thingie.

Honestly…I’d rather stick to the comic series.

Cooking, actually baking!
High on my to-cook list is tiramisu, some cookies and perhaps a cheesecake as well – for my former colleagues and some of my students. They are starting ’school’ tomorrow and I’ll be meeting up with them just to say goodbye and stuff like that. Not to mention that I need to drop off some things to one of my former colleagues.

But yeah, I’m thinking of shopping for the ingredients sometime on Thursday morning, make it that night – need to check with Mum on the availability of space in the fridge – and hopefully, if everything goes good, get it out to my colleagues on Friday afternoon as dessert. If I can’t find ingredients, I’ll probably settle on making some chocolate orange cheesecake since Mum bought some oranges from the pasar malam today.

I’m thinking of fine-tuning some of my cookie recipes, probably investing in a scrapbook of my own and write down the cookie recipes. Examples? My lemon/citrus/orange shortbreads, peanut cookies, butter cookies, etc…

Reading
My bookshelf is overflowing with books now – I have resorted to shoving about nearly fifty thin books into my cupboard simply because I have nowhere else to keep them. I also have two small boxes with reading material I used for work. First on my list will be to sort out one of my drawers (my bed had two big drawers under them) and place those books in them. Alternatively, I’d have to go through my entire collection, pull out books I don’t want and sell them to a second-hand store. Problem is I am not too sure where to go. Paylessbooks doesn’t want them. Any ideas?

Once that is done, I’ll be catalogue-ing my books and start reading some of the stuff which I have been meaning to but never ever had the time to go through. My huge Jane Austen book, Mists of Avalon, and other classics/contemporary fiction. I don’t think I’ll list them here – too lazy.

I think that should do it for now. What a weekend!!!